The Sirius Pup Guide to Intimate Relationships in a Pack - 5

If love is based upon flows of good will

First, following the notion of different levels of success in moral acts, we can conclude that whilst successfully loving one person is good (in terms of positive effects on both people through the mutual flow of good will) then arguably loving more than one person is better. We aim for that better amount of love in our lives with a pack. 

How does this play out for our pack and you?

In terms of gains for yourself, as there is not an end point to human development, there will always be a benefit to new experiences, new perspectives, new sources of aid and support. Having chosen to act on your desire for love with reason, your life gets additions which you learn and benefit from. Every person you add to the weave of your relationships - if treated respectfully with good will - enriches the tapestry of your life. For those you love it means your generosity and respect is spread to more and more people, which is obviously nobler than confining it to one person.

Secondly, the 'recognition of rights and interests' of your beloved by you (as required by exercising good will) means at times you will understand that you cannot personally fulfil those rights and interests. You can't be everything to everyone.

The keystone of good will is mutual respect; there is no call to martyr yourself for those you love and perform acts of duties you dislike or are very uninterested in. Rather, you should support your beloved in achieving their goals even when it involves other persons to fulfil them, intimately or not. Compromising, you can do things for your relationship that are less than exciting - someone has to wash the dishes - but the banal day to day activities are hardly the hopes and dreams of your loved ones. They want and desire greater things for them to grow and develop, and you can participate in them getting that, knowing it won't be at your detriment because they bear you good will.

Both of you have the opportunity to be more fulfilled as people through the ability to love more than one person. You have loved multiple people in the past - your family, friends. You can love multiple romantic partners too. To think otherwise is a self imposed limitation, and likely one driven into you by a morality that is telling you about sin and badness. Loving responsibly and rationally is good for us in our pack, and we have abandoned that negative limiting thinking of some others to forge our own fulfilling path.

Other people aren't the big problem to solve

Taking everything  mentioned here in these articles into account, it can be seen that the primary difficulty in a pack of lovers is not - as many suppose - jealousy; but actually time management. Acting in good will - to be respectful and involved with another persons life and goals whilst at the same time allowing time and space for your own development - will take time. For each additional person added to the web of your relationships additional time is required; and quite often the time required will increase in a seemingly exponential manner, as acting in good will often requires you to spend additional time considering and acting on how it would affect your other relationships. It gets complicated, and you have to take time to think about what you are doing and the impact of what you do has on multiple lives. It is very much about time time time.

Love in a pack is a work in progress, a continuous effort done in a spirit of good will, with respect for each other and helping one another grow and explore loving in their life. 

We end with this example of how we deal with love between multiple human pups in our pack. The pups mentioned are not real, nor is the example based on specific events. It is just an example. 

An example of fucking around and sharing love

Imagine a couple called Rex and Spike. They have a mutual friend Rover. All of them are interested in human pup play. Rex and Rover share a mutual attraction, based in part on a shared interest in a subculture of gaming that Spike is completely disinterested in. Spike has become aware of the sexual attraction and mutual desire for each other that Rover and Rex have. 

There are a number of ways this scenario can play out. Let's examine them from the least successful to the most successful. 

The least successful solution is for Spike to react harshly to both Rex and Rover from a feeling of jealousy. He destroys his relationship with Rex and ruins his friendship with Rover. The pack splinters. Spike has not acted from a place of good will, he hasn't wished for his partner to get what they want too. All he has thought about is how he feels and he has completely missed the moral target. 

A better solution is for Spike to do nothing; to maintain the status quo. He maintains his current relationship with Rex and Rover, but Rex and Rover are still unfulfilled. This is the sentimentalist position; stasis shows an unwillingness to work for the good for all parties involved. Trying to not allow anything to develop because Spike feels his love is more important and can't adapt to change leaves others not being able to act upon their love. It suits Spike, but is very selfish. Spike has hit the target but it is not the bullseye. 

The best solution is for Spike to recognise his limitations and actively encourage Rex and Rover to explore their attraction and subculture together. He maintains both his relationship with Rex and Rover and demonstrates that he respects Rex enough to encourage him in his goals and interests. This is clearly the bullseye, as all three people are more fulfilled; Spike has confronted and overcome any potential feelings of jealousy, leading him to be a more rational being. Rex and Rover experience their mutual attraction to each other as well as gaming, whilst maintaining affection and love towards Spike for acting as a rational being and supporting them. 

It is an example of how it can work. It requires effort to make it work. It requires examining your own underlying assumptions of morality and how does human pup play actually work for you. It requires you to act and be a good person, not to sit back passively to receive love and affection. The benefits are enormous - feeling love and affection from many, and have a pack of people who add their own distinctiveness and talent to your life. 

Not everyone wants to have a pack and experience group sex and intimacy. We wish them well. We don't apologise for our choices. We have clearly explained that we have made these choices with an ethical guideline and we practice what we do in good will towards one another. For those who do not feel they could ever be involved in such relating we are glad they reject us as they clearly are not going to work out as pack mates. For those who seek to join us, we consider our relationships carefully because we have limited time to share. For everyone we wish them to have love in their lives.